things my professor said

April 30, 2011 § Leave a comment

As most of you know, I was in school this year. Due to work, I took mostly night classes. I did however, need to take one course that was not going to be offered at night or during the summer but only in the morning. Let me make this clear before going on, I am not a morning person. I hate loath mornings. Half the time, the Mister does not even speak to me because I am just awful. I truly do not mean to be this way; I just cannot do mornings. Ever. I got stuck taking a morning class this semester. It was an easy course and something I knew a lot about, Political Science. I quickly found out by the second meeting of this class, that my humor is slightly slap happy in the morning. He was hilarious….except, I was the only person laughing at his jokes besides him. Yea, it was a little awkward to laugh out loud in a lecture class when no one else is laughing. Not to mention, I sit in the back so the laughter just traveled throughout the entire room. I seriously think my Professor was funny, and he looks like this guy:(Bernard from “The Santa Clause”)

I began writing down some of my favorite jokes from the classroom. My fingers are crossed that you will also find these comments to be entertaining as well. It is going to be a sad day when I realize my sense of humor is not the norm.

  • “By the way, ‘Burn Notice’ is a fantastic show.” -speaking about becoming thieves instead of college students
  • “Delaware had 5, maybe 6 people.” -talking about the Constitutional Convention
  • “Bong hits for Jesus rally filled with hackey shacks was outside my office window my first year of teaching.” -speaking of religious practices that were deemed unconstitutional
  • “What are you on crack or something?” -first thoughts when changing his major in college
  • “I’ll make the extra credit worth your while if you go protest.” -regarding the student protests in Wisconsin
  • “Jackson trashed the White House during his inaugural speech party. He basically partied like a rockstar-guns, moonshine and horses.”
  • “We are talking about foreign policy people, not mental health. You do not need Zoloft for this.” -thoughts on bipolar system

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